Alright folks, I have worked for Microsoft for a minute now and there are some things that are just plain weird about the folks that work here. I mean, shit that is just plain bizarre and makes no sense. I got some questions for my Microsoft brethren and am hoping to clear the air of some things that have been bothering me lately (in no particular order)…

1. Why do you need to email me a calendar event for when you are going to be working from home or out of the office? It’s not an event I am going to be at, and if I want to know where you are I CAN OPEN YOUR CALENDAR!
   
2. Why do you feel it is necessary to check your mail every 10 seconds? Don’t you think checking mail on your smart phone on one hand while you are peeing at the urinal with the other hand is a little extreme maybe?
   
3. Why did you require me to fill out a BRD for the OEM additions on the LMS before OSGS is allowed to go to GCS and ask for UAT from all users in the GAL? I can’t even RAS in! (ok, why all the acronyms?)
   
4. Why do you look at me sideways when I walk down the hallway with my iPod, you have one too?!
   
5. Why do we need to re-organize every 6 months?
   
6. Why do you not know how to properly use Windows? You know, sometimes files don’t get stored on the desktop, gasp! Can you find ‘em?
   
7. Why is EVERYONE a program manager at MS? Is it bad that I am not one?
   
8. Who posted this poll on MSW (the internal MS portal) Seriously? What were you thinking?

   
   

9. How can I do any work when I spend 50% of my time in meetings, 20% tracking the tasks I am assigned in meetings, 20% writing about how those tasks help me meet my commitments, and 10% fill out dumbass polls and surveys like the one above?
   
10. Why do the full-time employees think they are so superior to the contract employees when the contract employees are never the ones there on nights and weekends? Who really has a better handle on work-life balance?